Is stressing about your wedding taking most of your
energy? You need that energy for running errands and making decisions. To
harness the energy you spend stressing and put it to good use, you first need
to find out what exactly you are stressing about. Many aspects of a wedding
cause stress, and you need to figure out what that aspect is before you can rid
yourself of it.
One major cause of stress is the idea that you need to
keep up with social and personal expectations. Stop worrying about other
people; this is your day, and you should have it how you want, not how your
family or friends want. Many couples also stress over getting the wedding and
reception perfect. Perfection rarely happens, so don't go overboard in trying
to get everything that way.
Another cause of stress is disagreements between the
couple and whoever is actually planning the wedding. The couple is very
involved in the planning, but most of the time someone else, such as a family
member, a friend, or a wedding coordinator plan the event. This shift of
control can sometimes take a toll on the bride or groom if they are used to
When disagreements occur, don't start a fight or raise
your voice. This will just make things worse and add to your stress. Your
wedding day will be one of the best days of your life, so you don't want hard
feelings to be present during this special time. But you don't want to give the
silent treatment, either. Rational communication is your best bet. Calmly and
politely talk out your problem with whomever you are having a disagreement
with. Also, try to compromise. If the person planning your wedding has an idea
you just aren't sure about, give it a try! People who plan weddings for a
living usually don't go too wrong with their ideas. It might even turn out
better than you could imagine. And remember, be thankful that you aren't in
control over everything detail of the wedding. Accept help in planning and
delegate as much as you can.
Here are some ways to cut down on stress:
waste time and energy sweating about the little things. You should concentrate
your energies on the more important things. Spend time worrying about the dress
or cake rather than worrying about which guests will sit next to each
- Get plenty of sleep. If you're like most people, sleep is last
on the priority list. But in actuality, it should be on the top. Not getting
enough sleep, or getting too much sleep, will drain you, wear you out, and make
it harder to deal with the stress. A good amount is probably 8 hours. You may
not think you have the time, but make the time; you'll be glad you
- Smile, be happy, and think positively. Don't say things like
"this idea will never work out." If friends and family see you smiling and
being happy, they will be more likely to do so. All of this planning is for
you, anyway. Also, don't forget to laugh.
- If you want to lose a few
extra pounds before the big day, do not crash diet. Just like not getting
enough sleep, crash dieting will consume all your energy, and you will end up
cranky and irritable. Just exercise. Go running or biking a few times a week,
or join an aerobics class. Exercising causes endorphins to release into your
body, which give you energy and help you to be happy. Exercising is not only a
good way to lose a few pounds, but it also releases the stress that is built up
inside of you.
- Pamper yourself! Treat yourself to a day at the spa,
and get a massage, a facial, or manicure. If you can't afford to go to a spa,
relax at home: take a hot bath, light aromatherapy candles, and listen to some
of your favorite relaxing music.
- Instead of stressing about before the
wedding, spend time thinking about after the wedding. Envision the honeymoon;
think about spending time with your companion for all time.
- Just get
out of planning and get out into nature. Turn off your phone, TV, and computer
and go for a walk, anywhere. Enjoy the beauties of the natural world.
Plan a fun date with your fiancé. Pretend like you have no wedding to
talk about, and just have a fun and crazy time. Or do something romantic like
relive your first date, or give each other massages.
- Not everything
will work out perfectly, so have a sense of humor. You'll find it's the only
way to get through the planning and still keep your sanity. Blowing up and
yelling at people will only make things worse for everyone, including
- Take a girl's night out. This is especially good if you and your
fiancé are irritating each other because you've been spending too much
time planning together. A good old fashioned girl's night will help you take a
load off: give each other facials, manicures, pedicures, and watch your
favorite chick flick.
- Help others. The best way to get rid of stress
and get your mind off yourself is to help others in need. You will feel so
great after seeing how grateful someone was for your help.
everything in perspective. Remember that all this planning is for one wonderful
Remember that feeling overwhelmed is very normal. If
you're not a wedding coordinator, then you're probably not used to all that
goes into planning a wedding and reception. Don't get frustrated if you aren't
on Cloud 9 all the time. Stress will come, so just keep your mind on the
outcome of all the work you're doing. Once the big day comes, you'll be able to
relax and enjoy yourself and your lifelong love.